Bad Habits

Queer

In 2004, this amazing film, Closer, was released. That shit changed my life. It certainly changed the way that I looked at adult relationships and fidelity. Fucked my lil idealistic head up, if I’m being honest. Because the truth of all this;

Being human: you gon fuck up.

Might not be adultery, but being imperfect, we not always gonna get the shit right. But. It’s also how we handle things. & how the other person handles things. Because with some shit, there’s no going backwards. For me anyway. When it comes to trust and being honest with intentions, I hold that shit in high regard.

Funnies shit about that though? Just bc you hold it in high regard, doesn’t mean that the other person does. Well. Whatever the case. Broken trust, is hard pill to swallow. & falling in love (or lust) with other people absolutely can and does happen. It’s how you handle the shit as it comes up (& openly communicate about it) that can save ya some time, energy &/or heartbreak. All in all, I didn’t want to go into a new year without creating/posting content from Closer. & remix it with a lil twitter.

I’m not Rihanna I do not love the way you lie. I will block you.

Video clip I edited featuring Closer x twitter

Prayers v Puscee

Queer

What in the cosmos…

Ok a few planets are in Aries, rn, if I’m not mistaken. I remember someone mentioning 4 of them by May 24th- which, ironically is my Gem Sun/Leo/Taurus ex’s birthday. Also coincidentally, she has her Venus in Aries. Which I just found out recently, but explainsssss A Lot 🤓

But I digress from the main Aries point. If you’re not an Astro Heaux like I am one (I’m not a professional, I’m an enthusiast who appreciates all the ways that learning about astrology has enlightened me) I will post an infographic on Aries for you to give you an insight to what the vibe is:

So.

This Aries energy in the sky, rn. Add that to Mercury being in Gemini 🤔 perhaps it might be the reason for what I’m about to say. Oh & it’s eclipse season andddd almost Mercury retrograde. Pluto is already retrograde to. Sooo who am I to deny this energy the cosmos has beseeched upon us 🫡

Ok. Now

If I’m replying to your personal stories featuring selfies, low key (& high key 🔑 ) thirst traps with heart eyes- wait & I say personal because I heart eyes other shit all the time; pets, delicious looking plates of food, etc, but not anyones selfie or no shit like that…because I don’t want anyone getting the wrong impression. Unless it’s one of my gay ass friends beings exceptionally fucking fabulous, thas different.

So if I heart eyes the image or video of YOU, or share some choice (always respectful- I don’t get *disrespectful til we start dating and & even more so when we start mating 😈) words of enthusiasm, based on what I see/admire/lust for 😂…and you hit a nigga with the prayer hands 🙏🏿…I’ma stop sending them. & assume (like I heard someone say- prolly saw it on twitter, tbh) No hard feelings, but I’m prolly not the intended audience 🎯 of said image or thirst trap…& I gotta respect it and keep it pushin.

To be honest, I didn’t want your prayers, I wanted your pussy.

Bless

Blessed.
Like you riding my face and baptizing me in your wet-

Lemme chill, lol. Also, today feels like it’s ruled by Venus, but Jupiter calls the shots. I ain’t mad at it. I fuck with the vibe.

*disrespectful* = respectfully nasty and freaky, but sooo much so-that it seems disrespectful. For ex. “disrespectful sex”

Get it? Well. IYKYK 🤷🏾‍♂️

BMW

Lesbian

She gave me THAT look…

That smirk with that beautiful ass smile

That look that I know so well
Her pussy was ready
to put me under her spell…

Well…?

Euphoric.

It was like I was swimming in the bluest fucking ocean

Under the most beautiful clouds and
Silently our Souls screamed out loud

& those waves…
Those fucking waves!

I rode into the shore & within every stroke
I kept riding & riding
& her tides kept on rising…

So much nourishment…

I was never thirsty again…

Symbolic
Magnetic fucking love emotional thunderstorm

Moon to Sea:
Attraction

& I rode the fuck outta them waves man
Wet,
Sticky
Passion

“So. Should I keep goin?”

Laughter & Lesbians at the round table. A good night.

 

Someone else’s wife

Lesbian, qpoc

THAT Conversation:

C’mon. YOU said you would be honest with me & keep it real! & you want me to do the same, correct?

I nod.

Cool!

This teenager was hyped at making a point that was actually truth.

Respect, right?

He asked sarcastically as he tilted his head to the side.

Fine. & DONT tell your mother I’m out here smokin, either.

I got up and looked over the balcony as I exhaled.

Shit. I’ll never forget the first time my eyes found your moms…

I shook my head.

I know you’re probably gonna think this is corny, but…the moment I saw your mother…Time. Stood. Still. & in that frozen moment the only two things that existed was your mother and the pounding of my heartbeat.

I couldn’t believe a woman THAT beautiful was sharing the same space with me…
&…she looked at me. She…looked into me…she looked…through me with her gaze. She was so confident and commandeering even in her strut across the room. My eyes followed her & wondered what the fuck I did to deserve to have this gift, presently in my presence…

& what the hell happened why you ain’t push up?

I cocked my head to the side.

You know, why man. Your OTHER mother. Also known as your moms wife.

Yeah, but she wasn’t even around for hella long! She left us and you were the only person that helped my mom. I hadnt seen her smile or laugh or be happy for real, for real until yall became friends. She was hella depressed and then you came along and that changed.

Yeah.

I sighed. The kid was right.

Still. That’s not the way to start something…to start anything. With lies and deception. That just begets more of that shit & my Soul just ain’t about that.

Besides…initially! When I thought your mom was available…man…

I shake my head.

The amount of Love I had planned on sharing with her…it would be too beautiful and we…I, couldn’t start out like that with your mom. Whatever is meant to be, will be. So, if it’s gonna happen, it’ll happen the right way. That energy, kid. It’s universal currency. You don’t want to afford that type of karma.
I hope you feelin me at least a little.

He sits there quietly for a minute. Our backs turned away from the living room.

No thoughts, huh?

Just doesn’t seem fair, though. The way you talk about my mom, the way she lights up whenever she see you! It’s so damn obvious she in love with you!

Excuse you-

Gisselle butted into the conversation after obviously eaves dropping…

Journal Entry…

gender, LGBTQ, qpoc, qwoc

Fuck. I guess Number 1.
Yowsers.

Listening to The Zone- Drake The Wknd
Cuz it reminded me of your smooth, sexy ass…

Then.
It
Hit
Me

My …

Higher Me
Speaking to my

    1. Higher

SELF

Remembering
Only moments earlier i was One with Spirit and Self
In Gratitude for being Saved once Again…

I thought………..
I
Lay

    • My

higher Self

& then The Birds Part 2- The Wknd again.

It HIT ME

what if:

    • What.

 

    If?

YOU
WERE [ MY ] WIFE???

How would [ I ] feel?
If
You were to do with her

that
you

    • Should only be

 

    • Doing.

 

    • With

 

    ME????

Ha

me?

Me. Striving for a better.

Would let

Lust

Destroy the Trust

& willingly. knowingly. Break. Love.

& It Hit Me

How could I intentionally. Willingly. Hurt. Another human being
even though I don’t know her & she don’t know me?!

Being as how i had meditated hours earlier & in my very present being
Gave thanks & got lifted to Higher Self

& it hit me!!!!

That shyt just ain’t me.
Not my Style or Soul.

So I exhaled all the images of your fine ass.

I shouldn’t have even entertained it
So.
Went completely through iPhone & erased:

HISTORY.

Thank the Goddess for realization and growth.

Goddess be with us in our hardest times. Thank You.

20140210-011213.jpg

Synchronicity like a MF

LGBTQ

So. Not only did I JUST post a Blog/Journal entry about me and a married woman, but RIGHT after I post said entry, I get a Notification of a new email. Cool. I check it. & it’s a new post from a fellow Blogger more on the Spiritual level.
And
Um.yea so.

Just as I let it Go. & I released it by erasing all contacts, willingly b/c my Soul finally made its way back to the surface (Gratitude for that!)
Agh
That’s a breath full
But.
As I was saying…as I made this decision from a place of Love, the Universe confirmed BIG time my decision by sending me this via email and having me read/receive this particular message that was right on time. Give thanks.

 

Well

Bisexual, Gay, gender, Lesbian, LGBTQ, qpoc, Queer, qwoc, sexuality, Transgender

 

 

I ate all of it

Ravenous

& I ate it like I wouldn’t get it again…

Even though I know exactly when.

& when we wake up
Ima have her grippin the sheets…bent over and grabbing the nightstand

It’s your fault.

& because of you.

Here we are…two

consenting…… adults. Consenting to

Kink
Induced
comas

& I was on her

Then.

I was
In her…

Like……
I fuckin Love her
Like & I been loved her

I touched her

I fucked her

I kissed her

*slow

I let my tongue go.

Exactly how her body responded

Indulged in her abyss

Deep- A place where you forgot to be

A place inside her…You…Forgot to See.

& thats what happened