blessings

Forever…until, infinity

Queer

A love, a vibe, a connection. An undeniable fact:

Always
(Until the trees and seas just up and fly away)
Always
(Until the day that eight times eight times eight is four)
Always
(Until the day that is the day that are no more)
Did you know you’re loved by somebody
(Until the day the earth starts turnin’ right to left)
Always
(Until the earth just for the sun denies itself)
I’ll be lovin’ you forever
(Until dear mother nature says her work is through)
Always
(Until the day that you are me and I am you)
Always
(Until the rainbow burns the stars out in the sky
Until the ocean severs every mountain high)
Always mm mm

“As” by Stevie Wonder

A love. A bliss. A connection. Joy. Irrevocable…feelings, emotions & logic: all in alignment. And remembering the dream, the gift that is love requires no additional thought. Just feel.

I’ve been off from work for a few hours. & enjoying music from a time before. & the incomparable Mr. Wonder is playing on my Spotify playlist, “O.Geez”

Plus.

The temps and weather right now…is weathering

Clip/gif from the film, Forgetting Sarah Marshall (love that movie)

Yeah the temps rn on this particular island…is feeling like the temps in one of my favourite places to live: the Bay Area.

So. I’m happy. My fellow islanders, not so much 😂 but I love it and it feels great. Matter the fact, it feels/aligns with and matches my mood. Good asf. I love it. Give thanks. For a whole lotta tings, but rn, especially music. & especially this gratitude and genuine love that I am blessed and inundated with. Yeah. Alluhdat.

Roy, Mary, Airy

Queer

Life is amazing. I mean, of course it’s not perfect.

I have my very human moments of overthinking, anxiety…have you seen (been living in) the state of the world? Depression. Relationships with people you love dearly that need adjustment, or disengagement. & learning (doing your best 😬) to give yourself the same grace and compassion you extend to others. & simply navigating life and the world as a queer Black person.

I mean…

yeah.

Life be Lifeing.

But, the Sun always shines again…even if it ain’t tomorrow.

Some shit ain curable in a day let’s bffr.

But.

However…it does eventually.

And what a refreshing feeling.

It’s like…taking Lessons in Breathing*

Until it once again becomes automatic

Natural.

Beautiful.

Abundant Life all around you.

And.

Love ALL around you-

no longer sustaining oneself from a single source

that wasn’t you.

You appreciate the beautiful blues and remember that they are the same hues

As a tropical sky

Beauty:

Is

Within the eye

👁

Of the beholder.

What you believe

What you perceive

Your thoughts and thinking becoming things

Beloved…

Remember the sunshine. Do your best.

*shout out to the amazing Slam Poet Theresa Davis & her life-changing poem (She brought tears to my eyes during several different performances of this poem back in Atlanta)

“Breathing Lessons”

Black Beatles on the island

Queer

Just got back in the house after filling up buckets of water and toting them into the belly of the beast- aka where the fire behind mine and my neighbors homes are. There are a couple hot spots left but I just doused them in water and hosed/sprayed 🚿 the shit outta those areas and the green vicinity.

This is a continuation of my adventures from yesterday in being an amateur firefighter when your actual one’s aren’t available/around/understaffed etc.

Yeah. Myself and my neighbors had a time from about…I wanna say 6pm yesterday when the wind blew the “small bush fire” that was 6 houses down, directly behind several of our homes.

& that bitch was mean. I mean…raging at times.

Kinda reminds you of an Aries…or a Taurus if they get to that point 🤬

I digress. Fun night (not at all) but very grateful that we are all safe as well as our homes/property/animals. Give thanks all day.

This post was initially not about me learning the importance of controlled burns and clearing the bush behind your property annually. But yeah no…Lessons acquired.

& I also gotta big up my neighbors because we really all came together and made sure the other was ok and helped water each other’s lawns while the actual fires were being blown closer to our properties and the embers were blowing in the trees, grass, roof…

Ok but…aside from that, here’s why the eff I started this entry:

I read something just now that said, “find your missing piece” in regards to dating/relating.

& my immediate thought after I rolled my eyes was:

I am my missing piece.

-me

Ain no way ima go around proclaiming and affirming to the Universe that I am incomplete or missing something, if I’m not attached to or coupled with someone. That’s wild as hell. Sounds like some serious spelling tbh; you making an agreement (and lk 🔑 putting a spell on yaself) by thinking and believing that someone else has to complete you. Shit. You gon be searching forever (outside of yourself) for something that you are responsible for;

i.e.

Completeness and wholeness externally

Your own happiness/bliss.

Ngl to you, I been there, too. Could’ve written a book!

But. Give thanks for growth! and learning that was a false premise.

Yeah. That’s all I got, rn. I’m lk 🔑 exhausted from being alert & up all night/morning watching the smoke & bush behind the house.

Nonetheless, I had to take a quick moment to write that last part. Didn’t think I was gonna talk about the first part, tbh. & here we are 😎

Life…is wild. & crazy beautiful. Give thanks.

Stay Ready ||2.18|| What a Life ✨

Queer

Usually…well, I don’t think I made a post last year But I would post something about my B’EarthDay on my IG feed…but this year? Ine into dat. I just…am realizing that I’m not much of a fan of having my personal life up for public consumption. Been posting less and less personal stuff on the socials for a while now. I’m accepting that this is the most comfortable and balanced I feel. So yeah no

But I will post here. No personal images or videos…but, gratitude. Which is enough for me. My cup runneth over ✨

I treat myself (I do my best-some days not so much) and am treated wonderfully by the Universe, my fam and dearest loves/loved ones.

Every day.

& In the ways that I show up for myself. The foods I intentionally consume and those that I stay away from. The intentional ways that I practice body movement, breathing exercises, take the time to meditate and incorporate healthier ways of being. Sticking to my morning routines. The ways that I speak to myself (the intrusive thoughts, too cuz I can overthink like a mf sometimes) but. Also what I allow and no longer allow. Having and sticking with my healthy boundaries. The life that I have cultivated that is inundated with peace. Abundance. & love. I am so much more aware of and grateful for my life and life in general.

I am extended thee most beautiful and divine love; stemming from my closest humans, to acquaintances and strangers alike.

I am grateful for every human that crosses my path. Whether it be for a reason, season &/or a lifetime…all tings align.

But yeah man..I’m just gonna continue on this path and gracefully and humbly accept all this beautiful ass love and life that I get to experience. It’s a blessing every day above ground.

Granted, some days that’s a lil hard to remember…because: being human. & Shit sucks sometimes…like shit 😂 but man. This ride has been wild af, like bat shit wild some of the things I’ve seen/lived/experienced…what a life. From ATL to the Bay. & errywhere in between…

I’ve had my share of setbacks, setups (ill-intentioned people, envious/jealous people will teach you A Lot of priceless gems and teach you how to better navigate life cuz it’s a lot of them mf’s in it) heartache and heartbreak…& I wouldn’t change that shit for anything. All it did was gift me with experience, lessons, wisdom, shadow work, discernment, a therapist! 😂😂 and the list continues with a whole lot of beautiful ass blessings along the way.

It led me here . To me. As I am now. I’m grateful af. Cuz it and I am only getting better and better. Refinement. More life 🥂 Give thanks ✨

Brighter Than The Sun…UT

Queer

I wrote this piece with someone in mind. As sort of a love poem, love affirmation and manifestation. But somewhere, somehow shit got lost in translation…lost in space. But found on time. I am grateful for all of my love& life teachers, regardless of length of stay. I love being inspired and moved to write words dedicated to love. That’s the root. Everything else stems from that. So. I give thanks for presence and the essence of divinity. The reminder that love is beautiful and free. & the hope of a thing also makes life more beautiful.

Image by Alex Grey
I’m writing you poetry
And consistently show you
The love that you deserve
Intentionally, slowly
Unfold you like the most delicate petals of a rose
🌹 
I will leave you whole and not pluck you
But know every day I always wanna fuck you-
& love you. & I will always pick you
While leaving your roots room to grow, too

You are my Queen bee and my flower
Love you enough to relinquish power
& control
Behold, the ferocious Goddess
& that’s being modest
Cuz there aren’t enough words to describe your beauty
truly
Divine
You and I are truly aligned
The Universe and my Ancestors are so benevolent and kind

They way they placed us together
You’re my most valued treasure
Loving you is so easy. Loving you takes no effort.
I give thanks for mutual effort
Mutual love and healthy obsession
Learning in real time that I’ve mastered the lessons
Every day I am in awe of your special
Gas you and fill you up until you’re an overflowing vessel
Of love that radiates
Nothing and no one predates
Our chemistry and energy
The way we love each other, intentionally
the generosity and blessings within our connection
Is unprecedented
You found me and gave to me-thee
Sweetest love
Your care, your affection and your time

Thank you for appreciating me
Thank you for adoring me
Thank you for reciprocity
and for loving and receiving me

Thank you for being solid
And easy like Sunday morning
A Sunday kind of love is what you give every day and it’s what I’ve always wanted
Thank you for that beautiful smile
Thank you for taking the time to get to know me on deeper levels
Your love helped me discard that hard fixed sign shell
& invited me to openness
I will always love you on purpose

Each and every day
& in every way
You bring me such joy and cognizance
Learned to lead with my heart over the simply logical sense
I love our attraction, I love our passion-it’s so intense

In the best ways
I’m excited to spend time with you knowing that these aren’t even my best days
I prayed
For someone like you and here you are
Love- a beautiful reminder that love knows no distance and is never far
away

I know that heaven is a place on Earth and it’s with you
Every day is beautiful and better than the next
I love our openness
The vulnerability
We are on the road to free
Just had to make some stops along the way
I love when you message me, I love hearing your voice-it makes my night and day
So much better
I love reading your love letters
I love receiving your love…and sharing mine with you

In tune, Direct Neptune

Queer

That’s it…that’s the tweet Blog. Ok that’s not it, but damn…this Instagram post stopped me in my fucking tracks and I HAD to share it on my Story and now, here. Because I don’t want to forget it. I don’t ever want to forget the moments that led me to this post. And how divinely timed this shit was.

The fact that I had been playing “Real Love Baby” when I first saw this post also solidified what my guides were trying to tell & remind me:

That settling for lukewarm or bare minimum effort and love is not the business. That I am worthy of a love so sublime and so divine, that it reminds me of love; that I am love(d).

Every bone in my body will be sure. With love and humans coinciding-she doesn’t have to be perfect to be the antidote, the cure…

pure vibes and love. A love affair and love story to rival any epic tale. A love that’s real. And ready. & open and willing to move through the discomfort and the temporary. My love will choose me as I do her, endlessly. She will be solid in her love and intention, not on the fence about me. Not perfect, but perfect…for me.

I could write and write and write…but I’m gonna keep it brief and soak in the words above. A reminder of a perfect love for me. Imperfectly existing, never waning or drifting. Gifting me with her presence and consistency…hold her down as she lifts me. Transporting me to heights not reached previously. & honestly nobody else exists to me… Real Love, Baby

I look for ______ in a woman

Queer

I created this video that I posted to my IG stories. I don’t see why my wordpress fam should be denied, lol.

Intimacy vs. Isolation

& I would like to add that I appreciate & highly value: honesty, integrity…vulnerability (as long as she feels safe to be) and authenticity. A Goddess who isn’t afraid of growth. Someone who is loving, a kind human and affectionate..I like that shit

Pulled this from my IG Story Highlights

A Goddess of Sensuality with healthy boundaries. Worldly, i.e. loves to travel and experience new places, while appreciating the beauty in other cultures and ways of living.

She exudes femininity & has a sense humor/can be goofy and loves to laugh & be happy*

*I fuck with all the vibes, but just not the fake ones*

So I’ll never be one of those “positive vibes only” people. That’s like being a robot with no feelings & is just plain harmful & toxic. IMO. so yeah no. We all experience a range of emotions and being able to process & deal with them in a healthy way is the goal. Be angry, be pissed off, be moody if need be, just as long as we not suppressing our feelings, we good. Healthy communication is key. Healthy outlets and knowing oneself; for example my 12H Sun calls for isolation in order for me to process. & I’ve found that taking the necessary steps & space to do so works best. For me. So I want her to feel comfortable with feeling the big and sometimes not so pleasant feelings and do what’s best in her own ways of processing & healing. As long as we’re not sweeping 🧹 shit under the rug and lovingly & intentionally dealing with the opportunities (notice I didn’t say “problems” -because words are powerful) for growth and greater understanding of ourselves and one another.

Soooo, yeah healthy communication is paramount. As is emotional intelligence. & Being cognizant of each other’s love languages. Respect. Even in difficult times.

Loyalty and commitment to one other is also high on my list of things that I value…as an Aqua Sun, Capricorn Venus also respecting each other’s autonomy and monogamy. Stable foundations and co-creation, not co-dependency.

If there’s anything else I think of that aligns I will add to this further. But yeah…

I love David Rose 🌹/Dan Levy. He is one of my fave Leo’s ♌️

Rasta Shoppin

LGBTQ

I don’t care if I have 1 million or one single dollar…I am & will always be Blessed. So. There is a gentleman that I pass by every day on my daily commute and walk into my office bldg. I said Good morning as I normally do when I see him and he was sitting just as he does every day beneath the AC Transit bus stop or near it. Today he was underneath I’m sure because of all of the rain. I stopped. & I spoke to him and saw him wrapped in this beige blanket, still with smile of Peace on his face. My, my. Just a reminder that happiness is free.

I had about 14 minutes to spare before work so I dashed across Clay and 11th in my slippery ass Supras and against the wet concrete and grabbed him a coffee and some breakfast. Definitely a slippery slope (couldn’t help it, lol). It was raining like a mf and I figured I could at least kinda help him stay warm as he sits outside in the rain…about 45 minutes later I ended up leaving work.

On my way back, we conversed a little more as he offered me a slice of his pumkin pie…my heart was full and here this gentleman was with little to nothing, offering me some of what he had. Hmmm. This is God. This is Her reminder that She is Present, everywhere and in all things. I did the “hmmmm” because some people have so much & still won’t give or help anyone else & here he is, offering me some of his food. As I stood there talking to him, his Soul shined so bright & the warmth in his smile moved me. I Am so so sooooo grateful. So my Spirit started speaking and I asked him, “you need anything, man?” He said to me, “you know, I could use a toothbrush and some toothpaste, some deodorant if you can.”

So. I did what I would do for my father or my brother or a friend…things that we a lot of times take for granted that people only wish they could have on the regular. Well, I know what it is to have and I also know what it is to have not…The Goddess is gracious to me – and I am beyond grateful. Thank you for your Spirit and reminding me that God is Love. I Am God and so is he. Gifts between gods.

Cheers to you, Rasta! Thanks for the reminder of Love!

Give Me Love

Lesbian, LGBTQ, qpoc, Queer, qwoc, sexuality

Her:
So…I heard you went to the dark side. So, does she have you worshiping the devil.

    • Me:

Don’t start. YOU of all people, please. Dont start that Judge Judy shit.

Besides being this beautiful ass Bruja, she’s fucking amazing. Incredible. A Goddess. She loves me sweetly. & completely.

    She. Rolled her eyes

Me:
Yeah it means the Universe to me when a woman, the woman that I am caring for & could possibly be Loving Forever gives a fuck and shows it.

Fuck. Be happy for my ass. She cares, G.

Her:
I Care!

Me:
I know that.

But she shows it.
And…I don’t have to guess if I’m on her mind, she tells me! & it’s not 7 or 8 days after we’ve seen each other, either.

    • Her:

That’s not fair! You knew the situation!

Me:
Yes, that’s why I chose me over your sexy, beautiful…gorgeous, albeit moody Cancer ♋️ ass.

I accepted that you and I weren’t aligning in the ways we needed to. I had to let go. I had to love me more and know my worthiness of more than a part time love affair. And once I did that…she showed up.

This woman manifested when I  was doing my best to not lose hope in Californian women…She reminded me of Love, again G. Not just any Love, but the realest, truest most Divine love.

My heart feels safe with her. I feel like…she wants the best for me. No matter what the fuck she and I are doing or if we were to part ways because our time together was done…

(I Smile from within)

She’s concerned. & asks me how my day is. She sends me amazing books to read. She looks up recipes from back home and calls my mum to make sure she is making dishes that my grandmother used to make, right. The magnitude of care…of her love for me…is immeasurable.

I FEEL her love. I see it…and, her love makes a difference.

Her:
Damn! She’s trying to lock your ass down isn’t she?!

Me:
It’s not about that, G.

(I shook my head)

Her:
Then explain to me what the fuck this (she pointed at the wallpaper of my phones background (which had a picture of me and my Goddess kissing) Is about?!

Me:
Love. That’s ALL I ever needed it, wanted it & demand it be about. Fuck your money! Fuck your cars! Fuck how many stocks you have! Your status or clout…nah.

Give
Me
Love

That’s all I give & ask for in return. Of anyone. Reciprocity of Divine love.

I can buy my own shit. Give me the the most unselfish gift you can give another person:

Your Genuine Love.
Your Time. Your Concern. Your Care.
As I give gladly & willingly because she deserves the best fucking Love, just as I do.

&. If you can’t:
Give me nothing at all.

Peace